Ok.. where to begin?

Friday, March 30, 2007 - Posted by Intellectual Elegance at 12:04 AM

HI Folks..

Well let me start off by presenting the timeline that has lead me to where I am today!

I am a first year law student at DU Law, and I have to say that now i enjoy it. Last semester was sheer and absolute hell. The material was difficult, i have read more in the past couple months than i ever had in my whole entire life, my life consists of waking up, going to school, eating, homework, reading, notes, sleeping and that's about it.

I am forced to ignore my AMAZING friends & family because I am usually in class or in the school, and that sucks! But oh well..

Last semster was very stressful and to be honest I HATED LAW SCHOOL! I thought that i had made a serious mistake because i couldn't focus, i didn't care for anyone in my class, and i couldn't care for the material or reading or anything else that had to do with school! And by the time i realized that i did care, it was a bit too late....

i remember it was December 12th and i was in a bad mood because we were getting ready for finals! it was the same day as the immigration raids in Greeley and i felt like crap because i was in "school" and not out being angry in the community or raising hell..

The next day, while i was in the library, i saw the front page of the post and saw all the horrific pictures of immigrantes being shackled and chained and then pushed into buses and i broke out in tears. I don't know if it was the stress from school or if it was my anger or a little bit of both, but at that moment, i realized that MY being in law school was much bigger than my selfish reasons for not wanting to be there.

I became incredibly upset with myself because here i am, a latina in law school and i am complaining because I don't want to be here! After all my family had worked for, i was willing to let it go that easily?? C'mon.. i pulled myself together as fast as i could, and i busted my ass to do the best that i could possibly do on my finals!

So, i did "ok" not great, and here I am again.. round 2! After i received my grades, i did alot of soul searching and realized that i had to actually put for the effort in order to get the grades.. (what a concept right?) but believe me, when you are in the moment, it doesn't really hit you until much later.

This semester, I love most of my classes, i am having a hard time in one specifically, because I don't care for it, but I am trying. I love my constitutional law and property class, and have found that I am quite good at both.

I must explain that for me in law school, there are either good days, bad days or just another day. Usually nothing falls in the middle, and when they are bad, they are VERY bad... imagine getting slapped around and spit on then dragged around by the hair. That is a law school bad day. Trust me.

So here I am, law school seems to be the abusive boyfriend that none of us can leave because we have the Battered Women Syndrome. They may beat the holy hell out of us, but for some odd reason I keep coming back and I love it. ;)

Buenas noches...

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Oooh the joys of lawschool!

Tuesday, March 27, 2007 - Posted by Intellectual Elegance at 5:32 PM

I have decided to create this blog in order to record the rest of my semester as I go through this ridiculous transition called first year law school!! :) This is also to help me vent out some of my frustrations of law school. So perhaps you will like my stories but perhaps you don't care, and that is fine wth me too, because really, I am doing this for me and not really for you. LOL

So sitback and enjoy the emotional ride.. :)

Love
Jazmin

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Welcome! Why this blog?

Thursday, March 1, 2007 - Posted by Intellectual Elegance at 8:10 PM

I've created this blog to chronicle the struggles that young professional latinas face in this country. Don't get me wrong, this is a great country, but culturally, economically, and historically, we are faced with struggles that sometimes others do not have to face or encounter. This isn't just a "sob" blog think of it as the Latina Sexo in the City. :) It will also chronicle the funny things that happen to me and my friends who are all up and coming young Latina professionals.

Our issues and stories aren't only for Latinas. It happens in other communities. I personally am a third year law student in Denver, and getting ready to graduate is a daunting task, especially in this economy. Across the nation, Latinas only make up 1.3% of the legal profession. In 2005 the Latino population was at 296 million. Our numbers are dramatically disproportionate and it makes me sad and upset.

As Latinos in higher education, some of us, carry a heavy burden on our backs to succeed. Why? Because our families are depending on us to help the family financially. How many of us have given a portion of our scholarship or financial aid refunds to our parents? How many times do you have to be responsible for your siblings success in high school or middle school? How many times have you had to be the mediator of the family? The translator? The therapist? The psychologists? As the first in our families to go to college, we carry multiple roles because our families demand it of us. They don't do it to bother us, but they know that we are the glue that helps hold our families together. We do it because we love them.

But this can also take an emotional toll on us, because many times we are the only hope. My first semester of my freshman year in college my parents divorced. They had been together for 18 years, and after financial and emotional struggles they decided to end their marriage. My little sister who was a freshman in high school and my grandmother still lived at home. Their decision rocked my world and it pulled my foundation out from under me. I became incredibly depressed and thought the best idea would be for me to come home and try to "fix" everything. Unfortunately, I couldn't just come home. I was on a full ride to the university and I wasn't going to be able to leave. But I struggled. I struggled every day because I couldn't imagine what my little sister was going through and I couldn't imagine what my beautiful grandmother was going to think.

All I wanted to do was be home with my family and be that rock. But I couldn't. My parents never reconciled, and my sister never fully recovered from that heavy blow. She had to watch them fight daily and I couldn't take her out of that situation.

These are only parts of what we face on a personal level in our quest to reach our dreams, change the world and provide for our families.

I hope you enjoy the journey and in the process comment back on your experiences. This is about good and bad and funny and real issues. So enjoy the ride. Somos Latin@s.

Hasta la Victoria Siempre. :)

Paz-

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